Family time is slowly becoming important as i grow up, especially after being living away from home..
Just by being home, just having a simple dinner on a saturday evening.. all these simple things made me happy now.
I have always been a very easily content, easy to please person.
I am glad to have my family and my friends here. ;)

I wonder why some would think that i am not that strong. . .
although i do understand that they just want to protect me from the hurt that i would have. . .
but honestly, what is really good for me.. is to just tell me the truth. . .
let it hurt me now, then to be late. . .
and so that i can get over with it sooner, than later. . .
all i want is to hear it from you personally, so that i wont spend the time hoping, wishing. . .
and to actualy spend time to heal my wound, as it has always been. . .

Somehow, thanks for at least telling me (now) still. . .
although everytime i think of Japan, you comes into my mind. . .
you will always be there somewhere in there. . .
even till the day when it doesnt hurt anymore. ;)

There's always this saying, 'The best is always the one that you can't have'
Guess there is some truth in it :)
Sometimes, no matter how deep you try to bury the feelings down in the heart,
no matter how hard you have tried to let it all go,
somehow, it still hurts..
Let time heal the wounds, and it will not hurt anymore.

Finally the chapter is closed, but i wasnt expecting it to hurt so much, all over again...

It is never easy to mend a broken heart,
Never easy to let go of someone whom u really loved,
But when its time to let go.. or when the one whom you loved has already let you go,
U know the time is here.

Things always happen for a reason, and i still believed that..

Somehow, the time has come.

Time to close the door completely, and open the other.

I once used to imagine how my ideal man should be, like, he must be taller than me, older than me, not more than 4years, someone who has his own ambition, inspiration, sporty, humourous, smart etc etc..
and i did went out with these so call ideal guys and loved them.. but i ended up being hurt each and everytime.. the biggest fall i had was the 5yrs relationship with whom i almost wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. someone whom i have changed myself so much that i dont know myself anymore. someone whom had betrayed my trust behind my back, maybe many times that i dont really know as i had not ever faced it. All these betrayal, hurt that i have experienced through my growing up days.. had made me stronger, and more sure of what kind of person i want to be with, and somehow in a way that i dont get into a relationship that easily too..

Trust has to be earned, from me, in this case. In friends, yes, that can be easy. But to be with me, its not so easy anymore.

When im away from home, i really found this someone whom i really want to spend my life with. Age was not a problem when we started. But as time went by, and things are slowly getting a little serious, i got cold feet.. i was watching the movie, Rebound, and it reminded me of what i was scared of.. i remembered telling him that he should be doing things that what usually people around his age should be doing, travelling round the world etc.. and not settling down with me etc.. it was almost the same with what the movie was showing... Hah! It was kinda weird..
Im glad the movie ended good. although im not too sure about my future, but im glad we still managed to keep the friendship.

And now, being in this new relationship, with someone who is younger, by 3years, instead of 8years.. everything is going on pretty well. Though it is now a long distance relationship, which is going to be so much tougher.. gues, other than hardwork, trust, and patience, Love & Fate & Destiny will reveal my Mr Right when the time is right. :)

How many people dislike tests, examinations when they were in school? Guess i belong to the minority who actually do think that having all the tests and examinations are a good way of testing myself on what i have learned for the year.

How many people realise that actually LIFE is full of tests? Honestly, this thought just came to me tonight. That life has always been a journey of tests, examinations for everyone of us. The tests does not end when we graduated from school. I remembered that someone used to said that he/she was really happy to finish education, so that there will be no more tests/examinations... ... Think of it, how many people you know, or even yourself, did said something like that too before.. ..

Life, to me, has always been a challenge, an adventure, a journey, that we make our own decisions, choose the path that we want to go, and embrace whatever that is coming. Even though the road might be tough at times, or maybe a lot more for some others.. Patience, Perseverence and Luck will eventually bring you to the place that you want to be.

Upon reflection of myself, i know that i used to take Life seriously. Sometimes, maybe too serious that I have set very high standards on myself, and eventually, to the people around me too.. Of course, there is always two sides of the coin that one has to look at. I'm glad that i have grown and learned so many things from all the people around me. I'm thankful to all the close friends who have been with me for these years, for their patience, love and understanding to me. I'm always thankful to my family too, and of course not forgetting those whom i had worked with, who have been such an inspiration, the encouragement and support that they have been to me.

As for now, being back home in singapore after almost 4years, has been a wise decision. And surprisingly, for the last 10years of being in the working force, i have finally stop, slowing down my pace. I am doing exactly the opposite of what i had been doing since i can ever remember.

Sometimes, in life, One do have to slow down and smell the roses along the way. Things that One thought that he already know, might not be the same now when he actually stop and look at it again.

1st June - the day when i am officially back in Singapore, after spending almost 4yrs in dublin.
I had thought about this for almost a year, and when i had made my final decision, i believed i had made the right decision.

It was not hard to hand in my resignation letter. I remembered that i felt a total relief when i left the ward after tendering the letter. I knew that i did the right thing.

I knew that the difficult part is actually to leave my friends, but the most difficult part is to leave Peter as well..

I should be happy when i touched down in Singapore, but i was actually balling my eyes out again, even after crying for the last 2days in dublin.. I miss him so much already, miss my life in dublin..

I dont know what will happen in the future, but i am looking forward for the challenges that will coming up to me.

Im grateful and thankful for my supportive family and friends. I am home now because of you.

It doesnt take me long to know if i can get along with a person,
and it also doesnt take much for me to dislike a person either.
I had one of the greatest time today spending with some fellow singaporeans friends.
I think this is one of my greatest forte, being with people, other than dogs ;)
Im going to miss all the friends that i had made in dublin here.....

My heart actualy skipped a beat, felt a little sore, and eyes were about to get teary, when i saw my sister put up pictures of my parents & my siblings..
At that moment, i wished how much i was there with them..
I cant help myself but to look through the pictures over and over again
and to realised how much my parents have aged,
and of cos my dear sister and brother too, have both grown up.. so much
Why do i have a kind of feeling that i am the only one who seems to have stopped growing..
Or Maybe i should put it this way,
that i have grown up too, but not together with my family,
especially for the last 4years for being away from home.
This time, it has really striked me that i really do miss home, and i want to be with my family.
Although it is not going to be easy to leave this place that i have grown to love, having my own life here, but somehow deep inside, i know that i have made the right decision.
And definitely, i still have a reason to come back here again anyway.
somehow or another, i believe it is so.

Was going through some of my schoolmates pictures on their FB page, and realised how times had passed and how almost eveyrone has changed over these years.

Come to think of it, most of my classmates, and even most of my friends are already married, most of them with kids, even for my little sister too! But honestly, i still don't even feel any pressure about getting married, or even having my own kids! ;)

Now, feeling that i could be different from the rest of my friends.. ;)
well, its not something that i am ashamed of, because i have always wanted to be different from others anyway.

I always dont like to just follow what is on the trend, follow peoples' track..
I always been the one who doesnt conform to rules. ;)
Wel, rules that doesnt make sense, or those which i think that can be bended (at least)