Finally the chapter is closed, but i wasnt expecting it to hurt so much, all over again...

It is never easy to mend a broken heart,
Never easy to let go of someone whom u really loved,
But when its time to let go.. or when the one whom you loved has already let you go,
U know the time is here.

Things always happen for a reason, and i still believed that..

Somehow, the time has come.

Time to close the door completely, and open the other.

I once used to imagine how my ideal man should be, like, he must be taller than me, older than me, not more than 4years, someone who has his own ambition, inspiration, sporty, humourous, smart etc etc..
and i did went out with these so call ideal guys and loved them.. but i ended up being hurt each and everytime.. the biggest fall i had was the 5yrs relationship with whom i almost wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. someone whom i have changed myself so much that i dont know myself anymore. someone whom had betrayed my trust behind my back, maybe many times that i dont really know as i had not ever faced it. All these betrayal, hurt that i have experienced through my growing up days.. had made me stronger, and more sure of what kind of person i want to be with, and somehow in a way that i dont get into a relationship that easily too..

Trust has to be earned, from me, in this case. In friends, yes, that can be easy. But to be with me, its not so easy anymore.

When im away from home, i really found this someone whom i really want to spend my life with. Age was not a problem when we started. But as time went by, and things are slowly getting a little serious, i got cold feet.. i was watching the movie, Rebound, and it reminded me of what i was scared of.. i remembered telling him that he should be doing things that what usually people around his age should be doing, travelling round the world etc.. and not settling down with me etc.. it was almost the same with what the movie was showing... Hah! It was kinda weird..
Im glad the movie ended good. although im not too sure about my future, but im glad we still managed to keep the friendship.

And now, being in this new relationship, with someone who is younger, by 3years, instead of 8years.. everything is going on pretty well. Though it is now a long distance relationship, which is going to be so much tougher.. gues, other than hardwork, trust, and patience, Love & Fate & Destiny will reveal my Mr Right when the time is right. :)

How many people dislike tests, examinations when they were in school? Guess i belong to the minority who actually do think that having all the tests and examinations are a good way of testing myself on what i have learned for the year.

How many people realise that actually LIFE is full of tests? Honestly, this thought just came to me tonight. That life has always been a journey of tests, examinations for everyone of us. The tests does not end when we graduated from school. I remembered that someone used to said that he/she was really happy to finish education, so that there will be no more tests/examinations... ... Think of it, how many people you know, or even yourself, did said something like that too before.. ..

Life, to me, has always been a challenge, an adventure, a journey, that we make our own decisions, choose the path that we want to go, and embrace whatever that is coming. Even though the road might be tough at times, or maybe a lot more for some others.. Patience, Perseverence and Luck will eventually bring you to the place that you want to be.

Upon reflection of myself, i know that i used to take Life seriously. Sometimes, maybe too serious that I have set very high standards on myself, and eventually, to the people around me too.. Of course, there is always two sides of the coin that one has to look at. I'm glad that i have grown and learned so many things from all the people around me. I'm thankful to all the close friends who have been with me for these years, for their patience, love and understanding to me. I'm always thankful to my family too, and of course not forgetting those whom i had worked with, who have been such an inspiration, the encouragement and support that they have been to me.

As for now, being back home in singapore after almost 4years, has been a wise decision. And surprisingly, for the last 10years of being in the working force, i have finally stop, slowing down my pace. I am doing exactly the opposite of what i had been doing since i can ever remember.

Sometimes, in life, One do have to slow down and smell the roses along the way. Things that One thought that he already know, might not be the same now when he actually stop and look at it again.