It could be all my past bad experiences in love r/s tat makes me so insecure abt the game of love..
It could be the darkest hideous scar in my heart that cause all my insecurities..
When its time when i am supposed to be the happiest person in love.. then i would want to give it up, and dont dare to go on with it..

honestly, the memory of my 21st bday stil haunts me til now..
It was suppose to be one of my most memorable day in my life.. i thought it was.. it was one of my happiest moments in life..luckiest gal in the world..
but many mths later then i found out.. i was the stupidiest gal in the world.. cos my then long term, serious bf has actualy been cheatin on me.. that was the most heartbreaking unforgettable memory in my life..

Even though it was so long ago.. but this deep hidden scar has never been recovered.. no matter how deep i had tried to hide.. but stil, it always resurfaced, no matter how.. tat is why i am so afraid of love..

Always felt that i dont deserve to be loved, or love again..
but who is to judge, who deserves to b love, who deserves to be happy..

C once told me.. I Got to know gd pple, make gd friends, bcos of whom i am..
J once mentioned.. Positive energy attracts positive pple..

Right now.. i dun know when the negative energy been surrounding me, its greyish all over..
Prob im fallin back into depression mode without realising it..

The Sun is Out today.. and so should i..
I shld b out in the sun, gettin all my sunshine, positive energy back into my grey life now..